God Bless the BROKEN Road

I never appreciated this song that much when my baby Lhoraine gave me this sometime ago... not until I've experienced it... Thanks so much Lhoraine!

UNCALLED FOR

It was the night of Palm Sunday; I just came from a church service when I received an unexpected call from an unexpected person. I was too hurt with everything I learned from the caller. I didn’t know how to handle the pain inside me and I thought where I had gone wrong.

Earlier that day, while I was in the mass, I was crying at the priest’s homily. I was bucketing out all my emotions to God praying and asking for him to show the answers to all my WHY’s; the causes of my worries and anxieties. Truly that night, everything was revealed to me. It was so uncalled for. I wasn’t ready but it was given to me. Ironically, that was something I should be grateful about.

It was a call that will bring massive changes in my life. I faced the Holy Week filled with mourning. Literally, I felt God’s passion on the cross. I felt like as if it was me being persecuted and killed. Days passed and the pain still lingers. I was praying so hard for Him to give me the enough strength and to guide me with all my thoughts, plans, and decisions. It was a call that indeed measured my faith and values in life. I know what is right and wrong but it was so hard to accept what is right. The truth hurts but it also sets you free. Until this day, I am praying for the much needed strength that only He can provide. Likewise, I am very thankful to all my friends who give me unwavering support and advice.

There are so many calls in life that we often ignored and rejected; calls that need most of our attention and actions. We never wanted to hear or answer them, the so called ‘wake-up’ calls, because of FEARS and RESENTMENTS. But there are calls that we couldn’t avoid no matter how much we try to hid ourselves. There are calls that will somehow strike our very heart that even if they hurt so much; we are left with no choice but to accept them.

MOMENTS

I was at the Samba-likhaan Foundation (Asian Institute for Liturgy and Music) yesterday for a meeting. We are working on a project for MAPEH (Music, Art, P.E & Health); more specifically on Music textbooks with accompanying CDs. It’s going to be first in the Philippines. Since, most Music textbooks used in the public schools don’t have CDs, and even in private schools as well. Even when I was studying way back (?) years ago, we didn’t have CDs in our music subject. Maybe that's the reason why, I never appreciated the subject that much as compared to art and physical education (PE). I was wondering then, how the songs are being sung or how they sound like! Anyway, it’s good that the government is really gearing towards improving the quality of education in the country!

That’s a very long introduction to my article (lol).

Main Point

While I was inside one of the music rooms, a very interesting poster caught my attention. It says: Choir’s Rule: #1 The director is always right; #2 If the director is wrong, refer to rule #1!

Isn’t it really interesting? It is RIGHT, I thought to myself! I began to relate what I've read to my spiritual life! I began to rephrase them, replacing the word director into God! That makes it Christians Rule instead of Choir’s.

In our lives, we have to trust that God always want the best for us. Whatever stakes, pains, conflicts, and failures we have, still God has a purpose why He allows us to experience them!

As I said from my previous articles, lately had been too rough and difficult for me. I faced too many personal issues especially in my relationship with friends, fellows, and even to myself. Only to realize that those are nothing compared to my relationship issues with God. My 'being hard' with myself and others greatly affected my spiritual life and relationship with God.

I always tell myself that I miss my old self! Why it has to be so difficult and stressful each day? Or am I just taking things too seriously? I believe I should, but it’s hard! I have so many worries inside my head. Worries are over flooding my head and I wanted to tell everything to God, but I just don’t know where to start.

I wanted to complain because I find it hard to follow his beats and I feel that I just couldn't catch up with the tune anymore! But as written in the poster... He is always right no matter how hard life may seems; no matter how hard to follow and live with His rules, still, He is always right, and we are called to obey and follow Him. In whatever circumstances, we are expected to follow and pursue what is right! (now, that makes being right very very hard!)

When I saw that poster in AILM, I realized how my faith weakens everytime I am troubled . I forgot the things, I used to strongly believe, "that God never abandons or forsakes those who trust Him". God helps those who help themselves… a big faith says: Do everything to your best ability and leave the rest to Him. I forgot how I used to leave my worries with him and manage to stay happy even when pressed with problems.

It is now Lenten season and I guess it’s the best time to pause and be still; to have a quiet moment with Him; to devote more time with reflections and prayers. Those are the things I really missed about myself! My availabilty and my TIME with Him!

Definitely, I will take THIS best time to rekindle and renew my ‘somehow’ withered faith with him! It’s never too late to change. It gives me hope everytime I remember that God always offer us the chance to reunite ourselves with Him. I need not go far because He is just a prayer away!

Have a blessed Holy Week to everyone! I’m going to miss you all!

He is my life's director and conductor, I shall never be lost!

A New Life in Our Lives

When it rains, it pours! I said so because the past several months had been rough and difficult. I faced a lot of difficulties especially dealing with some personal issues. On the brighter side of things, I am very proud and happy to announce that we have a new blessing in the family… baby NICO!

Dominic Asher, a 7.4 lbs baby boy, born in one fine Friday morning (March 6, 10:12 AM) delighted every hearts in the family. I will sound too biased if I say that among the 12 newborns in the nursery, he was the cutest and the healthiest! Sure thing he is! He was born via caesarian operation. He is the first son of my elder brother and the first grand son in the family. So, that really excites us all! We are all going to experience “first-time” feelings… it’s going to be a first-hand experience for all of us in the house.

The first time I saw baby Nico, I couldn’t really determine whom he got his features, and I think it’s a bit early to say. He got his mother’s eyes & complexion and his father’s nose & cheeks! He got my…hmmm…hmmm… well, it’s really too early to say but I wish he will get my charms (hahaha)!

Trivia: I was the one who gave Nico his name, Dominic Asher! To be fair enough, I gave my brother and his wife several options to choose from and they liked that one! The words Dominic Asher mean ‘belonging to God’ and ‘blessed and happy’ respectively! (Lucky for them, I don’t have a baby of mine yet, or else, that name wouldn’t be available anymore.)

Welcome Baby Nico! Welcome into our lives and we love you so much!

More Patience Please...

I can't believe I have been out that long! February has been a terrible month for me... and the feelings still extend until this month of March. I just couldn't feel 'focused' with anything... and it seems like everything are out of control! But luckily, I am still surviving the everyday hassles of life. I guess those thingsmake life more interesting and challenging! It made more believe in 'patience is a virtue'. I guess more than just a virtue, it is a necessity especially in these ever-changing, ever-hectic and ever-demanding times.

So before anyone of you out there gets out of control (like I did), ponder on these words of wisdom:

"When we are angry our feelings change from moment to moment. Anger produces feelings that are unreliable. Our feelings often rise and fall as our energy is drawn from the unstable emotions present when anger is being expressed. In those moments our feelings may not be the most reliable source of information to help us move past it. Before you blow up, cool down." - Larry James

hAPPY

IT's GOOD TO BE BACK!

Let GO and Let GOD

Letting go takes love. It is a part of our growth process. Letting go could mean opening up new possibilities and welcoming new opportunities. It entails us to grow and mature in so many ways. While the act of “letting go” hurts, we cannot move on until we cling on to the past.

Letting go is not being selfish but actually being selfless. You allow yourself to grow as well as the other person. It is going beyond your comfort zone. Letting go is a responsibility not just a mere act of getting out of the situation. It requires changes and improvements.

Letting go needs courage. We have to be strong to let go especially when the relationship becomes unhealthy to both partners; most of the times when it hinders our personal or spiritual growth.

Letting go is not saying ‘to forget’ or ‘to ignore’ but to learn from the past experiences. By all means, we should carry with us the ‘happy memories’ and the lessons we have learned from our past relationships. Only that, we have to let go and release the emotional baggage so we could open up ourselves and be present for the new relationship.

Letting go could mean we need extra help from the ONE above; that there are still much greater purpose and reasons why things happened that way. It could also mean that there are things that we don’t have control with. And only by humbly surrendering ourselves, we could understand more and appreciate the reason for letting go.

Let us not be afraid to let go even if it hurts us. Don’t be afraid to let go even if it means losing the person (we cared for and loved) for good. Sometimes, what we are really scared of is the feeling of animosity. We feel that it’s going to be hard losing the person we once had and loved and depended on.

And when it hurts too much, we still have a lifeline. We can turn to the ONE who always provide comfort and peace; the ONE who is close to the broken-hearted (Psalm 34:18). Let us always believe that God will never leave us in the middle of our journey! Not now, not ever!