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Compassion - How Much Does It Matter

Compassion is a gift a person can possess as one experiences God’s love and be able to share that gift with others.

Compassion is the ability to reveal one’s feelings for what they perceive others are feeling. To show compassion is the essence and apex of our humanness. A compassionate person is sensitive to the feelings of other’s pain, joy, disappointment, fear. A compassionate person can sense what people feel and express and reflect these feelings back to them.

I remember and I acknowledge my sense of being compassionate to my mother. She created to us an atmosphere of a “feeling family”. She taught me to be considerate and sensitive with how others feel. Maybe she’s too sensitive before that she would point out and revealed her feelings openly every time she’s hurt or offended. She would say “I was hurt” or “I feel angry about your terrible attitude”. I realized she didn’t intend to place guilt trips on me, but a way of attempting and cultivating me to become sensitive. Her character has shaped me a lot into becoming a “feeling person” as I grew older.

It is important to realize the strengths and positive outcomes of being compassionate by asking ourselves- do we want to become more human?

In our times, we experience people who would say “this is what I feel and I don’t care what others feel or say about me” – this does not convey feelings of compassion.

To be a compassionate person also means to have a sense of SIN. Sin most often involves hurting another and depriving another of the expression of our feelings can be very hurtful. It is better to acknowledge those hidden feelings than to be silent about them. Being silent or indifferent is more hurting and abusive than any physical hurts.

“He never made any comment on how hurt I was”… to be conscious of our depriving, hurtful behavior is the beginning of becoming a sensitive person. The more sensitive we are to another’s pain and more responsive we are to it by seeking forgiveness and making improvements, the more we qualify as healing and compassionate persons.

INSENSITIVE people, however, plow under or bruise people without any realization of what they are doing. Such persons are irresponsible, uncaring, and self-centered. They live inside their own world apart and isolated from the reality of others. They lose their sense of sin and thought they have no business with other’s feelings!

The more you are connected with your inner-self, the more sensitive and compassionate you become – you can relate and communicate that feeling with others and can see right through them!

We can never be compassionate if we lack sense of self! We must first in touch with our inner world – our pain, anxieties, anger, hurt, confusion, conflict, doubt, fears. Until we experience these feelings in ourselves, sensitivity and compassion towards other will never be attained!

Most people lacking compassion and sensitivity are usually not in touch with their own feelings and when they are, they are uncomfortable with them!

Remember that when you are compassionate and sensitive to your own self and to others, you truly experience God within yourself.

A compassionate person also must have so much feeling for others that he or she is willing to confront them.

Revealing your feelings of being hurt to the person who adversely hurt you is one way of expressing compassion. This may take form of anger, discipline, challenge, pleading, or even screaming – any way we can reach them, whom we say love! Direct confrontation is equally necessary to dislodge or unlock the situation. It was risky, but it worked!

I know a lot of compassionate people. Being on top is my mom, who unconditionally loves me and my kuya; Lhoraine, who fearlessly confronted me about my shortcomings so I may realize my mistakes and be sorry about them; my friends, Laurence, Lhoraine, Jackie, Rachel who are so enabled helping others, especially me during my hours of darkness. These people don’t act for me nor make decisions for me; neither solve my problems. They helped me reach inside myself to get in touch with my untapped and unrecognized potentials.

So, how much does it matter to be compassionate? - A LOT!

When LOVE is Impossible

If there’s one that I learned about life and love is to always express your love for someone even in the hardest way. Expressing your love doesn’t only mean being verbal about it; sometimes and most of the times, effort counts a lot. The problem is when we face disagreement with someone close to us and we just end up doing nothing and are silent about our feelings. That in turn, makes us indifferent and just accepts the fact that the relationship has ended.

"Relationship often dies because of silence and not in violence."

Proper expression of feelings is very important. It makes us healthy almost in all aspects; physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. It creates a good atmosphere not just within our self but with others, as well.

Lately, I faced a lot of stressful occasions and really it made me feel so low and dispirited. It encompassed not only my personal relationship but also my work and my relationship with a very close friend of mine. I told God that I could no longer handle anything else. I wondered maybe God taught of me as a very strong person, when in fact I am not. People would often see me that way not knowing that I am actually hurting inside. For the past months, I’ve been crying about my relationship with Bein followed by a sudden transfer of assignment given to me by the company I am working with. And just recently, a very close friend of mine expressed her disappointment to me. I was really frustrated and questioned why I am being hurt by the people I loved most? As I speculate on the things that are happening to me, I realized that I cannot handle all of them and that I need to trust God as I face all those challenges.

But if there’s one thing very good about all those happenings, I learned to express my feelings. I learned to accept humility as part of my well-being. I began to tell myself that I am hurt but not destroyed; that I can be better and that there is a chance to rise above the challenges. Challenges might be very hurting but they should never stop us from loving. They can even be a supportive tool that helps us to be stronger and more loving and sympathetic with others. We began to see that we are not alone in facing the tests of life because of the people who surround us with hope and love. I took every moment I have to communicate my feelings with them. Sometimes, it disheartens me when I don’t get a response but nevertheless, what’s more important is I have told them how much I value and love them.

Everyday, we are given the chance to make other’s feel that they are loved and that includes ourselves. Self-love is equally important in sharing our love with others and self-love requires self-preservation, self-respect, and self-trust. Absolutely, Self-love is much different from being Selfish. Self-love is necessary in order to love and touch other’s lives. And besides, nobody knows when our time is over so might as well do the best we can to impart love and inspiration to others. That is the very essence of our lives and that is what we are being called for – loving despite of hurting!

Always tell someone that you love them because you never know what day will be their last, or your own.

Always seek to resolve your problems or disagreements with loved ones because if either of you should pass on before, the one who is left alive will have the rest of their life to ponder those unresolved feelings but will never find closure. And closure usually brings Peace...

Everything in Between

It is a common knowledge that everything started and was created by God. We also know that our ultimate destination is also with Him. He is our beginning as well as our end! He is the Alpha and the Omega! But what we hardly recognize is what comes in between the start and the end.

Our lives here on earth are spent more in between these periods and what we do during this lifetime are the things that make up our lives and shape our characters! The things that we do today make us experience the fullness of life and prepare us for our final goal of one day spending an eternal life with God.

We are now in this “between” period of our lives. We are dealing with this journey given the gifts of perseverance and fortitude. There are times when we are greatly tested and it is very comforting to know that during this “between” period, we are given hope and a multitude of chances to make up with our shortcomings; not only to ourselves but with the people around us. We have the spirit of humility to accept that we are humans and as such, we have strengths and weaknesses. And as we grow and mature, we learn to accept and acknowledge our weaknesses and able to improve ourselves out of our own breakdowns and failures. And one way of knowing that we have accepted ourselves as a whole is when we view the sunsets of our lives with a smile on our face with a feeling of contentment for passing through another day and looking forward for the next one.

Personally, I find myself in this ‘between’ period of my life. I felt being the hardest of all periods but still the most rewarding. I learned the values of patience, humility and perseverance. All the more, this period of my life has strengthened my faith and shaped my confidence to God. I learned that nothing is too impossible to carry if only we recognize Him in all areas of our lives. He is the beginning and the end and everything in between!

"Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass; it’s about learning to dance in the rain."

"Every sacrifice has a fruitful reward. Every failure has a second chance. We only have to be strong thru God's grace and persevere in life's many tests!"

Becoming a Woman after God’s Own Heart

I have never felt so at peace and confident not until I have experienced my own pits. God has amazingly provided me the grace just in the right time and saved me. I have never felt truly beautiful in God’s eyes and others not until I received Him in my life. God has a purpose for every one of us and He reveals everything to us through our daily experiences. We encounter Him in our daily lives. As a woman after His heart, I know I have so many things to do in this life. I felt my worth and purpose of living- for others and most especially for God. I learned to entrust all my decisions and actions to Him. I learned the importance of “May Your Will be done, not mine”. It is through realizing and appreciating the significance of trusting God’s will that I was able to be released from fears, anxieties, and worries about the future or just about anything! I know I still have a long way in becoming a woman after Gods own heart, but I am getting there!

Rejoicing over Life’s Adversities

If there’s one very good thing I learned in my experiences with God- that is to rejoice over adversities! It may sound contradicting, but it’s true. I never appreciated the implication of this not until I experienced it. I rejoice over life’s difficulties because it is through darkness that I have seen and experienced His deep love for me. I have understood God’s promise of comfort and refuge, which He made available to anyone of us if only we seek and reach out for Him. I wanted and I pray for everyone to experience God’s amazing grace and love! God manifests Himself in so many wonderful ways. He is present in every life’s situations, in every emotion, in everything! He is always with us and never abandons us even if we sometimes feel like He’s sleeping and doing nothing over our troubles. But His presence alone is enough; we know that if God is with us, the storm cannot sink us!

Prayers Never Fail

Prayers are proven to be the best medicine God has given us. Prayers also serve as our connection with Him. We pray when we are happy or even when we are in sorrow for it’s the only way we can express to God our feelings and praises! It is like reporting to God what has happened throughout the day. It’s our open line to Heaven and even our lifeline! I wonder how life is without prayers. I could never have truly appreciated my every success and joy. I could never have shared with Him my happiness and delight. I could never have survived loneliness and being alone without prayers! I could never have survived my own depths of despair! Most of all, I could never have survived this journey called LIFE without it!