Infatuation or Love

I read a book by Gordon O. Martinborough simply entitled "I LOVE YOU". It is a book that deals on how to deal on the struggles of relationships - marriage, parent-teen relationship, love affair. It is a book that best complements human affaor with Divine affair. When our relationship with God is in trouble, definitely our human affair is in great danger, as well. It also deals with ways on how to deepen our love relationship with the Greatest Lover.

I found a chapter in this book that differentiates infatuation from love. Everyone of us seek for genuine love and the most common question is "could that ever be true love?"

1. Infatuation is ruled by feelings, but LOVE is feelings ruled by principle

Love is not composed of feelings only. It is feelings plus principled. In true love, feelings are under the control of principles.

Read Corinthians 13:4-7

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."

"Love never fails" (v.8)

2. Infatuation is blind, but LOVE sees and examines

While infatuation cannot see and do not wish too see, true love uses its eyes to see and to examine the strengths and weaknesses of the prospective partner.

Read Mark 8:18

"Do you have eyes, but fail to see."

3. Infatuation is in a hurry, but LOVE takes time

Everything of a permanent value in life takes time. As the famous line goes... true love takes time - time to know and time to grow.

Read Ephesians 4:15

God expects couples in love to "grow-up".

4. Infatuation is obsessed with externals, but LOVE is concerned with internals

True love is concerned with the personality, the kind of person the partner really is. It pays attention to the character, the inner self.

Read 1 Samuel 16:1

"Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart."

5. Infatuation is childish, but LOVE is mature

Infatuation is self-centered but true love is "other-centered". This is one of the most difficult thing to do because we tend to focus on ourselves, on our emotions, and wants. But love is concerned with the welfare of one's partner. It is a self-sacrifice that is given freely without expecting something in return.

Read 1 Corinthians 13:11

It has "put childish ways behind."

6. Infatuation is a human ditch but LOVE is a divine ladder

It should be clear to us that we do not "fall" in love, we "climb" on to love. Every person has the freedom to choose between the tragedy of one and the triumph of the other! In most cases of arguments, it is important that one goes down, the other goes up.