Men are Men

Men are equally loving! Although men don't seem to be as loving as women, it is because they express their love in a different manner.

When we are in love, we tend to ignore differences and focus only on the good stuff. Life suddenly becomes technicolored. But as the relationship progresses, we get to see our patner's 'other-self'. It turns out that our partners have qualities that we can't bear.

When my relationship with Bien first started, I used to see him as someone who's attentive and affectionate. I don't need to ask for his attention or time... everything is given freely. Now, he's invasive and 'in my business' all the time. I feel the need to demand for his time and attention (that annoys me and usually the cause of our arguments). Did Bien really changed? Actually, he didn't change that much, only that the relationship deepens. Consequently, that requires higher tolerance and understanding, as well. Our relationship matures and as it does, the real work of learning how to love incompatible human being begins. It is not easy to adjust and accept your mate's weaknesses and imperfections. The power struggle has begun and this teaches the couple the virtue of humility - to lower down one's pride to give way for his/her partner's feelings. Humbling down ourselves doesn't necessarily mean losing our identity but growing together in love amidst imperfections and trials.

10 Things You Need To Know About Him

1. He is Proud to be a Man

A man enjoys feast of admiration from his partner and colleagues. As I've said, we are in a male-dominated society. While women struggle for recognition out of being belittled in the society, men enjoy the constant build-up of their ego. A man doesn't deserve dishes of humiliation. Like for parents who wants to take pride of having a first-born child to be a boy... Men believes that they are stronger, and very vital especially in family and nation building. Men loves to be men... they enjoy the masculinity and the pride within themselves that they are powerful and indespensible; this is man's ego.

2. Job Success is Supreme

For most women, home comes first... while in men, job comes first. This is because the men views his success through his achievements. One of his highest goals is vocational success. They feel their worth when they are productive, financially. Maybe because it is a man's obligation to provide financial support to his family. An ideal wife must take this into consideration and should not abuse either way. A woman must provide the necessary emotional support to her partner and encourage him, rather than nagging him for arriving home late or for having less time with her and with the kids. Husbands regret the fact that they spend less quality time with their family but they also call tomind that their ultimate goal is to provide income for the family.


3. He Shows Love in Tangible Terms

Men reveal their love in tangible items. Most men are not expressive verbally, that is why they opt to give things that will express their thoughtfulness and care. For them, it is a great deal to give something out of their efforts and earnings. Thus, a woman must respect this characteristic of men by receiving the gift that they offer especially when it is given in good fate. Rejecting the possession that the guy gives to his partner would mean rejection on their being, as well. That is the reason why when a girl doesn't receive the flower that her suitor gives, that is eqaully saying "Sorry, but I am not interested."


4. He Makes Decision Differently

As discussed in my previous entry, men are usually left-brained. They see the causes first before the effects. They think logically, while women are intuitive. This means that men are more objective than subjective. The women uses their power of intuition, while men uses his power of reasoning. Because of this, a woman should listen to her partner's reasoning without interruption. She should not only listen but respect his reasons, as well. A woman has the power to feel the rightness and honesty of the statements, anyway.


5. The Man Receives Visual Stimulation

A man is more visual compared to a woman. Actually, this attitude of men applies to "love at first sight". It is a universal that men appreciates a woman's beauty. They are attracted to what they see. A woman's physical qualities matter to men. A man's attraction to woman's feminine strength is another topic.

"The rules of attraction for the human species are still not clearly understood. How it all factors into true love is even more mysterious."


6. A Man Likes His Wife to Stay Attractive

Since men are visually stimulated, they prefer that their wife stays attractive even after marriage, after giving birth, after raising the children, and even up to their graying years. This will probably help decrease the rate of divorce and other marital problems. One can say that this is too superficial, but it is a reality that every woman should take into consideration. Physical wellness and attractiveness of a man's partner can boost his confidence. He is proud to have an attractive partner. Most of the times, men tried to avoid saying it to his partner because it might offend her feelings, resulting to unsolved crisis. Tendency is, the man gets attracted to the next girl just because the couple failed to address this need. A loving woman must be sensitive enough to keep her man's pride. Women are men's priceless possession and he wants her to be like a diamond...timeless!


7. He Needs Sexual Expression of Love

Do I need to elaborate more? haha... It is the biology of men! Blame their hormones that are in constant build-up.


8. He Struggles with Midlife Challenges

While women needs new eggs to fill her empty nest, men struggles from midlife challenges and changes. In his mid-forties and fifties, biological changes start to manifest. His physical strenghts declines as well as his sexual drive that eventually can cause depression. At this point, men are very sensitive to his status, counting his achievements and earnings. He feels responsible to the outcome of his family life. He is happy to see his children grew well and right. He is also in need of his wife's constant support as he goes through this stage. Remember, they don't speak that much about their feelings, so women must be receptive and responsive at this stage of their partner's life.

9. The Man Secretly Welcomes Encouragement

Women are known to be emotionally stronger than men. Women boldly face their conflicts, pains, and struggles while men tend to divert the situation. These facts make women good source of encouragement to men. A woman must give encouragement to her partner when needed, verbally expressed or not. A man may appear hostile to his partner's words of encouragement, but deep in his heart, it echoes.

"The most precious possession that ever comes to a man in this world is a woman's heart." Josiah G. Holland


10. He is Sensitive to T.L.C

His heart melts... believe me, no matter how much he appears to be physically powerful and tough. A man is sensitive to Tender Loving Care shown and expressed to him. His heart softens everytime a woman (he's involved with) shows affection, fondness, and kindness towards him. Ever wonder how he is sensitive when a girl shows motives of interest to him that lead him to pursue courtship. However, he also feels when a woman he likes is not attracted to him. So girls, don't give any motives to a man if you are not interested to a guy because that might be perceived differently.



There was once an insensitive, irresponsible, alcoholic husband who never shown any love or concern to his wife. He could be branded as the worst husband in this world... One night, as his wife prepares a dinner for him, he asked her "What makes you stay with me all through these years? Why are you still doing these things for me despite my shortcomings and inconveniences? You could have chosen to escape and live a better life without me. I never hold you from doing so..."


His wife simply answered... "You are my husband. I made a promise of loving you through better or for worse. God said that wives should love their husbands. He never specified to love your husband only if they are good and kind to you... You are my husband and I never lose the hope of one day seeing you renewed because of LOVE."

Since then, the husband decided to leave his vices and unsaintly life... truly, he was transformed because of God's love, through his loving and patient wife.